Sunday, June 14, 2009

Episode 24 Lettuce Ladies, Vegetarian stunts

Episode 24

Lettuce Ladies and other vegetarian stunts

Hello and welcome to the 24th episode of Jay Wont darts podcast, where I scour the internet for .flv flash video clips, pare them down to audio only .mp3s, and deliver them to you as a long .aac audio podcast. I do include the links to the videos in my sources, you can see those on my blog,, or in the lyrics mode of your iPod, it will show the script for this episode, with the sources at the bottom.

My intro was of the Comfort Wipe, which, in case you didnt understand, is a plastic handle that you put toilet paper on, its advertised in the tv ad as for elderly people who cant reach that part of their bodies anymore, and the very obese, who have too much fat, to be able to reach. Thats an awful mental image huh?

Recently, the other people at my work mentioned PETA had Lettuce Ladies in New Zealand, the Lettuce Ladies are basically models, or wannabe models, who wear a bikini set made from fake lettuce leaves. They stand out in public, and say "go vegetarian", maybe hold up little signs, tell people to go to PETA websites, and basically get attention for the meat free cause. Many serious vegetarians and vegans really dont like PETA because of these cheap gimicky campaigns, often using almost naked women to sell the message of anti meat. I know I get a little annoyed by PETAs ads, that are 30 seconds long, are normally just hot women moving about, dancing, Alicia silverstone in slow motion getting out of a pool, looking at the camera in different ways, and then a she will say "go vegetarian" at the end, and "" will show onscreen. It doesnt sell the message, it makes being vegetarian seem like a fad diet, or maybe even like a product that needs to hook people into it, like how cigarettes were advertised as for business men who drove ferraris, and had a hundred beautiful wives at the same time.

I'll play the quick Auckland Lettuce Ladies clip I found, from the New Zealand Breakfast program, its very stupid. Paul Henry, the male host calls them bok choy, which is a fancy pants Chinese lettuce thing. Hear his response? Paul Henry is known all through New Zealand for being a really stupid man, hes rumoured to be ultra rich, I think he sometimes refers to his "roller", he has a Rolls Royce, and calls it "the roller", and a few times hes said really stupid things that get used as sound bites. I do think that these outrageous Lettuce Ladies stunts get attention in the mainstream media, it seems to be the only way to cover any vegetarian or vegan issues, they have to have a funny angle, for the news hosts to make fun of "those weirdo hippies", while the naked people just get to scream "go vegetarian!" at the camera. The Lettuce Ladies standing at the most well known crossing in Auckland, with the National Bank and the Sky Tower close, they did get on television, and people saw the message, but then Paul Henry the tv host just made fun of them really, about how good looking they were, and "who cares about the message". Is it better this didnt get on tv? I dont know, I like that the PETA Lettuce Ladies have been to New Zealand, and surely every vegetarian and vegan in NZ will know about it, it made me feel like im not the only person who doesnt eat meat in New Zealand. The people at my work were the ones that told me about it, they saw these three women, two from Auckland, and another who lived in Australia, and thought of me. Thats got to be good, that my friends saw these stupid women dressed up in lettuce bikinis, and they thought of my message. So I can help spread the actual information, once the sexy ladies have flirted with everyone passing by to get on television.

I thought I'd make this episode to play some other funny, or wacky vegetarian videos, most are from PETA but there are a couple of other ones , like from Veg TV which is an online only video producer I think. They do a good interview with Kermit the Frog, although he never admits to being vegetarian, but that he thinks its a good thing and it cant hurt. A few videos are from Fox News, the most right wing news coverage in America. They mostly have videos making fun of the weirdo hippies parading about, in their redneck eyes the lettuce ladies etc are pushing 5 year old children to have sex. Other clips I play will be quite serious, but with interesting people, that you wouldnt have expected to be vegetarian, which is always really great to learn, it shows anyone can be vegetarian.

One of my favourite clips I'll play is of Dennis Kucinich, hes a 60 something year old Vegan, who ran for American President for the democrats. I think I could have actually voted for him, if I were american. Its hard to imagine anyone but Obama getting it sure, but it would be fun to vote for a peace loving Vegan guy. He also has a hot wife, Elizabeth Kucinich, who is literally half his age. Shes vegan, tall, thin and with gorgeous red hair, just how a woman should be!

Some of the PETA ads are to do with celebrity endorsements, theres Alicia Silverstone, whos ads were taken away from Texan broadcasts, because they were too sexy, I have an answer video to that, cloris leachman, who i hear you say? well she plays Grandma Ida, the old evil slavic lady on Malcolm in the Middle, shes apparently vegetarian which is cool to know, I'll think of that when I see her on Malcolm in the middle.

For the first clip, I'll play a fairly dull interview with some overseas Lettuce Ladies. Its got bad sound quality sorry.

Ok, the other clips should all be of better quality, and more interesting, that clip was just to get rid of the darn Lettuce Ladies. I'll now play the Alicia Silverstone ad, that has her coming out of a pool of water and flirting with the camera, this is a longer version , where she actually says more than 2 words at the end.

This and some other PETA ads were banned in Texas, for being too sexy. I found a great reply video on Youtube, someone telling Texans to stop being so fat, and leave the animals alone. The sex related stuff really makes me cringe, a lot of the sexy women telling people to go vegetarian in PETA ads focus on impotence, basically saying "like, if you eat meat and stuff, its gonna make your you know what, like, not work and all?". I get sick of hearing that again and again, and to me I think its a bad primary message, there are much better reasons to be vegetarian or especially vegan. To say that all men who eat meat, that the meat makes their dick fall off, thats not very true is it? Its not like only vegan guys can get a woman knocked up, or else humans would be basically extinct. All except for the 3 vegan guys in the world, and the few million Vegan women.

Enough of my talk, I'll play the texas related ad. It goes into a PETA ad at the second half.

Someone critical of PETA is this large american woman, she says shes helped at animal shelters before, and in this clip she reads some of PETAs "sea kittens" stories, PETA has taken to calling fish Sea Kittens, to try and make fish appear friendlier. I have nothing against the Sea Kitten idea, PETA sells some cute looking toys on their site, basically they are little cartoon fish that have cat features, masks and other disguises to look like kittens. But this woman in the Youtube video clip I'll play, shes pissed off with PETA.

I like her Sea Kitten story voices.

These are some celebrity PETA clips, first I'll play Cloris Leachman, the 80 year old woman who plays the awful Grandma on Malcolm in the Middle.

This one is about Elvira, shes that woman that gets parodied on The Simpsons as Boob-erlla, "stare at my booooooooobs", she dresses like a vampire, or Morticia Adams from the Adams Family I guess. She hosted B Movies on television. This ads kind of fun, although I dont know if the woman who plays Elvira is Vegetarian, it doesnt say so on her Wikipedia page, and if its not on Wikipedia, it cant be true!

I never knew Forest Whitaker was vegetarian,

I have a few more PETA celebrity clips, I dont mind these PETA clips, being serious and to the point, much better than the naked Anti Fur commericals. However, to break up the serious ads, heres a news story about a Vegan Stripclub.

Back to serious ads, James Cromwell is the guy you may know best from the movie Babe, he plays the farmer. He decided to be vegetarian from seeing how animals were kept, and during Babe, decided to be a Vegan because of ethics. James Cromwell also played the oldest prison staff man in The Green Mile, he had the wife with the mental problems.

my other Veg TV clip is the Kermit the Frog Interview I mentioned.

Kermit the frog, now vegetarian? I'll hold him to that.

The last PETA celebrity ad, about Masta Killa, love the name, a famous rapper, and also a vegetarian.

just two more clips now, I'll play them as my outro. One is Fox News VS PETA, and the other is Dennis Kucinich, presidential hopeful. He seems like a great guy.

I've went away from my wacky vegetarian ad theme during this episode, to show that some ads PETA has done didnt need nudity to be memorable. Im going to remember the Veg TV Kermit the Frog interview, just as much as I'll remember any naked model, and thats saying something!

Thank you for listening to my show,

If you want to contact me, even just to say you listened, send an email to, j a y w o n t d a r t @, I'd appreciate it.

Have a super happy day, bye.

======= lettuce ladies interviewed lol go veg ad banned in texas, rebuttal angry anti peta sea kittens lady fox news vs peta Elvira ad cloris leachman, malcolm in the middle grandma Ida Dennis Kucinich vegan stripclub

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