Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Episode 14 Blackbirds

Episode 14, Blackbirds, Common Blackbird, and SR71 spy plane :)

Episode 14, Blackbirds

Hey guys, welcome to episode 14 of Jay Wont dart's podcast, where I talk about things that interest me, and maybe you'll find interesting as well.

This episode is about Blackbirds, first the Bird happens to be Black, and then the Area 51 spy plane.

The intro for this episode was the second episode of Auto Tune The News, search for it on youtube. I asked permission from the stars to be featuring it as my intro. I'll include the link in shownotes as always, that you seen in the lyrics mode of your iPod etc, but its easier to just search "auto tune the news" on youtube. Auto Tune The News works by using a green screen to put extra people into news footage, its quite cool to see how they hide the extra people in behind podiums and other items in the news video. Make sure you watch the full video, and see other Auto Tune The News episodes that have been made.

I've also decided to do a new outro format, I'll stop throwing the same song on, Cant Say No To A Soldier, and instead do another No Agenda clip for the end, so hopefully each episode will have a shiny new intro, and outro for you to listen to, start to finish.

The Common Blackbird,latin name Turdus Merula (meaning thrush, and blackbird), is found worldwide. There are many different types of the actual Black-Bird, and thats excluding every other animal thats both a bird, and black. Interesting fact, only male blackbirds are actually black, the female is a dull brown, probably better for camouflage. Males start off fairly dark brown, and they eventually turn black, with a bright orange beak, and orange ring around each eye.

According to Wikipedia, Shakespeare wrote about the Blackbird, calling it a "woosell". Not sure if Im saying that right. , "The Woosell cocke, so blacke of hew, With Orenge-tawny bill" Apparently Woosell was a popular name for the Blackbird up until the 17th century or so.

Blackbirds have long been my favourite common bird, I like how shiny and black they are, as well as the colour around their eye and on their beak, that bright orange. Blackbirds eat a lot of insects, which makes me sad, but they do like berries and other fruit too. So theres hope that I could have a whole bunch of Vegan Blackbirds, they eat any seeds or bread you leave out for them.

They normally over 20 centimetres long, and weigh between about 80 and 120 grams. My iPhone weighs about 130 grams in comparison, its fairly solid for a cellphone, so that gives you an idea. Lets say that a Blackbird weighs the same as the average cellphone. Birds all have hollow bones, to make them light enough to fly.

Apparently Blackbirds can mimic other birds, they can hear other birds singing, telephones ringing and things like that, and impersonate them. Its meant to be fairly rare for people to hear it though, not sure why. I think thats pretty impressive, I know that people who have caged birds often find them mimicking people and the telephone, its probably because they are so bored and lonely in the cage they are trying to have exercise.

Here is some of the Blackbirds song, they sound similar to other thrushes, like those light brown and white speckled birds, that look almost the same as Blackbirds if not for colour.

Did you recognise that?

I also like Blackbird nests, they are round and quite smooth, the brown, female Blackbird makes the nest, from twigs, sticks, thin scraps of plastic and other long and thin materials she can find. Mud is used to stick everything together, I've never watched birds making a nest from scratch, must be pretty impressive. Inside the nest, 4 eggs are normally laid, they are a light green colour, like light green/blue chewing gum, with red spots on it. Overseas , other birds like Cuckoos try and sneak their eggs in to the Blackbirds nest, thats where the term "cuckold" (cuck-old) comes from, it means a stupid husband doesnt know that the children in his house arnt his, his wife cheated on him, and hes raising some other mans kids, like Cuckoos try and pawn off their eggs to other birds, for others to raise. New Zealand doesnt have any cuckoos that try and do this to Blackbirds, but overseas there are plenty, and the Blackbirds there know how to spot the difference between the eggs, I think they throw the other eggs out of the Blackbird nest when they find them.

Blackbirds are monogamous, like most birds, they stay with their partner for their entire lives. Very sweet. Daddy Blackbird also helps feed the chicks. Wikipedia says most Blackbirds in the wild live for just over 2 years, doesnt sound very long to me. The oldest recorded individual was over 21 years old.

A clip from Wikipedia about the song,

A sad fact about Blackbirds, they often have parasites. They pick them up from all the time they spend in long grass, they get ticks, and internal parasites. Especially rural birds in the country, 74% of French countryside birds were found to have parasites, only 2% from urban areas had the parasites, according to a French survey.

One more clip from Wikipedia.

I often wanted a pet bird when I was growing up, when I was very little my parents hand lovebirds, they are nice, green and red coloured little birds, like budgies. But its very mean to have birds in cages, since Birds naturally fly long distances each and every day, and have whole social communities, with different songs that get memorised by different "blackbird tribes". If I could have a little Blackbird friend, I'd call him Winston Peepers, like Winston Peters the infamous New Zealand politician, but with Peepers for the 'peep peep' noise baby birds are meant to make. I'd teach him to raise hell, my little fighter squadron of Blackbirds would knock spinsters, ha, only old ones, not pretty Vegan ladies who could have any man they want, down steps, to get their handbags. Or, maybe I could teach them to have just one on the footpath, with a note in its beak, it would beckon the old lady onward, she'd take the note from its beak, and read "give me all your money", when she failed to do that, then my black cloud would descent from the rooftops and peck her to an inch away from death, and THEN take the handbag.

I've always thought Blackbirds looked very nice and gentle, but theres something kinda "evil" about them, not sure why. Its not the colour black, I think its the orange band around the eye, its like a bandit's mask or something.

I figure, even if for some reason my song birds didnt want to murder the elderly, they could always just fly around town and find shiny coins on the street, im sure birds can notice those very well, they will have great eye sight, and notice shiny things. But, up until now, birds wont have understood the concept of money. I'll change that, I'll get my little friends to pay for their own keep, finding money in return for Budget brand canned corn, worth about a buck at Pak n Save.


I started off talking about the Blackbird, now I'll talk about THE Blackbird, the SR71 Blackbird, officially the fastest millitary plane EVER. This baby did over 3500 kilometres per hour, to put that in perspective, the largest commercial planes do about 900 kilometres an hour, the SR71 was heading close to 4 times that. Most fighter jets now have been stuck at about 2000 kilometres per hour, none do 3000, at least no known fighter jets can. Its a matter of balance, its either bigger, thirstier, heavy engines, or a tradeoff to get excellent maneuverability, to be agile as well as fast.

The Concorde, that lovely supersonic commercial plane, it could to 2000 kilometres per hour, and was very, very hard for fighter jets to keep up with. But the SR71 would breeze past it. A way to measure speed is the time it takes to go from London to New York, a Boeing 747 takes a little over 6 hours to do the trip one way, Concorde could do it just under 3 hours, so thats twice as fast, 6 hours, down to 3, the SR71 did it slightly under 2 hours.

You know that Austin Powers bit, where they see all the weird things, and call out rude words? One part has Dr Evils spaceship showing up on radar as part of a man, well the SR71 pretty much looks like that in reality, its very beautiful, but kinda obscene too. Its very long looking, it looks black, but Im told its actually a very, very dark blue, made out of titanium for strength and light weight, with two large engine pods , one on each side.

The SR71 is the only successful version of its A12 precursor, which was actually very slightly faster, by a tiny bit, and could also fly very slightly higher, because it was lighter than the SR71.

Other versions of the A12 include the YF12, an interceptor, basically all the A12/Y12/SR71 planes looked pretty much the same, 90%, and flew over Mach 3, they were just for different roles. SR71 and A12 were for recon, spying, with their cameras and sensors, the YF12 was for taking out bomber planes. Officials decided that the YF12 Mach 3 interceptor wasnt needed, no bombers went near that speed, and so it was never created in large numbers. 32 SR71s were made, 13 A12s, and just 3 YF12 interceptors.

I'll focus on the SR71 again, it could barely take off, it leaked its ultra expensive fuel on the ground, needed help from starter carts on the ground, which had big american car engines in them, these spun the engines up to speed until they could run themselves, the plane limped off the runway, and had to dive, point down to break the sound barrier, Mach 1. But, once it got up to that speed, it rapidly accelerated to Mach 3. The engines themselves are rumoured to have handled mach 4 and a half, about 5000 kilometres per hour, but the rest of the plane couldnt handle the heat. The SR71 was made out of Titanium almost entirely. The Titanium had to be smuggled in from the Soviet Union, it had to be hidden, because the US was in the Cold War against the Soviet Union at the time of course.

Politicians were often against the SR71, who didnt understand it, and saw it as expensive and un needed. The Air Force was also not very fond of it. The SR71 was taken out of use in late 1989. It had survived prior attempts at retirement. But, it was actually reinstated, and used again, the first Blackbird took to the sky again in 1995. The Blackbird was permanently retired in 1998. President Bill Clinton had cancelled funding for the plane in 1997, it was in 1998 that it was finally put into its grave.

Theres many places in America where you can see the SR71 Blackbird, I'd like to visit a lot of the air museums and see one for myself. One of the coolest ones is in New York, the Intrepid Sea Air and Space museum. Its a giant retired aircraft carrier, moored near a highway, and has a whole bunch of famous planes on deck, including an F16, and an A12, the precursor to the SR71. Next to it, theres a retired Concorde, wow, and a nuclear submarine. Just amazing! To think they are all in the same place, and anyone can see these treasures.

Thank you for listening to my Blackbird episode.

Time for my new outro, the clip is from a porn star award show! Its worth hearing!

If you want to contact me, even just to say you listened, send an email to, j a y w o n t d a r t @, I'd appreciate it.

Have a super happy day, bye.


Auto Tune the News episode 2, used for intro

Outro, Porn star show No Agenda clip from episode 92

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Episode 13 Crackpot

Episode 13, Crackpot.

A sampler of clips from the No Agenda podcast, focusing on Adam Curry, aka Crackpot.

Wacky, crazy, zany conspiracy theories are the order of the day :)

Make sure you listen to the earlier "The Buzzkill episode" for the other half of No Agenda, John C Dvorak, The Buzzkill

Friday, April 24, 2009

Episode 12 and The Buzzkill

Episode 12, and The Buzzkill

A clip show extravaganza! I've taken a fairly random sampling of the No Agenda podcast, focusing on John C Dvorak AKA "The Buzzkill". Listen as Dvorak talks about honey, hummingbirds, Soy Milk, oh, and flu shot conspiracies, evil business, false presidential elections.......

Coming soon, Episode 13, Crackpot, focusing more on Adam Curry's side of No Agenda :)

Thank you to the No Agenda podcast makers, Adam Curry, and John C Dvorak, for letting me use clips from their amazing podcast, my favourite podcast, excluding that VEGAN podcast for New Zealanders :P

Monday, April 13, 2009

Episode 11 Richard Nixon

Episode 11, Richard Nixon

Welcome once more to another fantastic episode of Jay Wont dart's podcast, where I blabber on about things you dont really want to know about. The opening is a clip from the No Agenda podcast with Adam Curry and John C Dvorak.

This episode, one of the worst presidents in Americas history, no not Dubya, but Richard Nixon. I'm doing this episode before one of my favourite podcasts, Tank Riot, covers Nixon, although I hope they decide to talk about him because Im not going to be as accurate as their excellent podcasts are. By all means, make sure you search for " Tank Riot " on the iTunes store, and listen to Viktor, Sputnik and Tor's podcast :)

Richard MILHOUS Nixon was born in 1913, sounds like such a long time ago now. He died in 1994, at the age of 81. I'd love to know what he would think of all the Nixon Parodies.

As a New Zealander, I'd heard alot about Richard Nixon, mostly parodies of him, and about what an awful president he was. He seemed to hate everyone in the world, being portrayed as a grouchy old white guy, with a gravelly, angry sounding voice. If he were an animal, he'd be a bulldog. I've heard a few actual nixon speechs, and he doesnt sound much like the common impression, but its stuck in pop culture. I'll try and do a crappy impression, im not any good at all, but it'll give you an idea. Its pretty poor , but I'll try it a couple times for fun.

< say something in richard nixon impression voice "im richard nixon, i hate you drugged out hippies listening to this new fangled podcast">

I guess the vibe I'm going for is a rabid sean connery.

I do have one of his most famous speeches, the Checkers speech to play later, and you'll probably notice he doesnt sound that much like his parody voice. I guess its one of those things thats been built up through the ages, that Nixon is an evil, evil man, in the Hitler category, and that he sounded awful to match his black heart.

The Checkers speech is important as its full with nixon cliches, it has a whole bunch of his most well known lines.

One rumoured quote that I wish I had a recording of, he found out that J Edger Hoover died, and said jesus christ! that old cocksucker!

That would be a great clip to play.

Nows as good a time as any to play my Obama Clip collection, these little beauties deserve an episode of my podcast all to themselves. Basically, current President Barrack Obama read his own audio book, he reads all the lines in his book Audacity of Hope, including lines from a racist sounding character who swears.

These clips went around the news a while ago, I just love hearing Obama swear , sounding like a pervert, and how he hates whitey.

awesome huh? Its going to be interesting to see what people think of Obama in a few years, if he was as great as everyone hoped. I realise saying that, i've just made this podcast feel dated, so future listeners, feel free to make fun of us silly 2009 people.

Nixon has some really soppy quotes, stuff about hoping to be remembered as a good man, a peacemaker, that kind of stuff. Real Obama stuff, thats what I was getting to before. But, Nixon had this thing about recording conversations, and that came back to haunt him, in the same way im going to be forever plagued by my shitty nixon impression.

"You know, it's a funny thing, every one of the bastards that are out for legalizing marijuana are Jewish. What the Christ is the matter with the Jews, Bob? What is the matter with them? I suppose it is because most of them are psychiatrists. "

"The Jews are irreligious, atheistic, immoral bunch of bastards. "

Richard Nixon is well known for the Vietnam War. Somehow people actually liked Richard Nixon at first, because he served two terms as President. Nixon stood down, and resigned from presidency because he was likely to be impeached, kicked out of the white house, from the Watergate scandal. I'll talk about that in due time.

Nixon was a Quaker, a religion basically thought of as American, although it was started in the UK. The full name of the religion is "religious society of friends", ew, makes it sound like a cult. According to Wikipedia, there are less than 400,000 quakers alive today, and it seems to be just in America.

Being in the "religious society of friends", a quaker, Richard Nixon was exempt from millitary conscription, but he chose to join the US Navy in 1942.

After World War II, Nixon got a seat in the house of representatives, he became a politician and represented California.

Quoting straight from Wikipedia,

I love the name of that group, House Committee on Un-American Activities, Un American activities HA! Imagine if New Zealand has a committee to find out Un New Zealander activities, it sounds like people have to conform to government standards for day to day life! Women have to act like perfect little wives all the time, cripes! The name was changed to "Internal Security" before it was gotten rid of a few years later. Something the House Committee on Un American Activities was known for was the Hollywood Black List, where the government cracked down on Hollywood for fear that popular films were housing communist propaganda! "thats uhn erh-mery-cun!"

During another political election, Nixon was up against a woman, Helen Douglas, that he beat by accusing her of being "pink right down to her underwear". Apparently most women's undies at the time were pink, and pink, or pinko is a term for someone who likes communists, pink looking like a washed out red. Douglas started calling Nixon "tricky dick". Both nicknames sound pretty rude to me.

In 1952 Dwight Eisenhower was president of America, and Richard Nixon was Vice President.

Here comes a great speech of Nixons, the Checkers Speech as its now known.

September 23rd, 1952, Nixon appeared on television to defend himself after he had been accused of misspending money.

Richard Nixon gave a review of his campaigns funding, and mentioned his own money situation. The Checkers speech is in pop culture because of some of the funny stuff hidden amongst the serious tone, Nixon mentions his wife PAT, sounds like a male farmer's name when nixon says it, well she wore a "Respectable Republican cloth coat", they didnt steal money from the public to spend on mink coats, she made do with a honest and cheap "cloth coat". The reason why the speech is known as the Checkers speech? At the very end Nixon mentions how his children wanted a dog, and a farmer sent him a dog, it sounds quite cruel how the dog was sent to him. Nixon says he wont give the donated dog back, because his children love it, they've called it Checkers.

I feel bad for making fun of his wifes name, reading more about Pat, she was born Thelma, but her father called her Pat because of their irish background. She liked the name Pat better and called herself that, or sometimes Patricia. Reading more about Pat Nixon, she did a lot of volunteer work, helped disabled children, and orphans.

I'll play part of the Checker speech now, its 11 minutes long.

Nixon doesnt sound anything like this, does he?

Now I'll talk about the 1960's Presidential Election.

Richard Nixon ran for president as a republican, against John F Kennedy, a democrat. The election was close the whole time, with Nixon running on his experience, and Kennedy wanting change, sounds a bit like John McCain vs Barrack Obama, or Helen Clark vs John Key. We know how this is going to turn out!

John F Kennedy claimed that the USA was now behind the Soviet Union when it came to missiles, The Missile Gap. Television was a new phenomenon, the 1960 presidential debate was the first to be televised. In the first debate, Nixon was recovering from illness, and didnt wear much makeup. Nixon looked old, fat, tired and confused, you can see him sweating. John F Kennedy looked comfortable in comparison. This has become a pop culture moment, often made fun of on Futurama, or The Simpsons, where a candidate is sweating and drowsy, like Mayor Quimby, and his opponent easily wins based on appearence.

Wikipedia mentions that people who saw the debate on television thought JFK was the winner, but those who only heard what the two presidential candidates were saying thought Nixon won the day. Could it be that a persons appearance affected the voters that much?

When the election was over, Nixon had lost by just 120,000 votes. Amazing. There was some confusion and charges of vote fraud, in the end its said to have been 120 000 votes between Nixon and the new President John F Kennedy.

After losing to Kennedy, Nixon moved back to California where he was a lawyer. In 1968, Nixon ran for president once more.

The 1968 election was at a difficult time, with racial tensions and hippies a problem. Many civil rights race riots occured, and divided the nation, and left wing students protested the Vietnam war, often getting into massive fights with police.

Quoting straight from Wikipedia,

Nixon ran a campaign promising Law and Order, to calm down all the violent protests that had been occurring. In a campaign promise, Nixon promised to end the conscription draft, to not force people to join the military to fight in Vietnam.

Nixon won the election against democrat Hubert Humphrey, by about 1%. One of Nixons slogans was "Nixons the one", sounds like something The Daily Show would make fun of.

In 1969, man walked on the moon, July 20th President Richard Nixon spoke live (with a considerable delay due to distance) with Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin, two of the three astronauts. Not very well known third astronaut, Michael Collins had to stay aboard the main module and keep it in space, he didnt get to stand on the moon.

Nixon approved development of the Space Shuttle, but was against a manned voyage to Mars, and a permanent base on the moon.

Nixon is also known for being friendly to China, who had split with the soviet union. The Chinese table tennis team invited the top American team to join them for a demonstration competition, it was one of the first times in twenty years that americans were allowed into China. These ping pong matches were included in Forest Gump, where Forest goes to China to play Ping Pong.

America and China became quite friendly, and fearing that the two would work together, the Soviet Union relaxed its policies towards both, for fear of provoking a war. This is called d├ętente "day tont", a french word which is basically used as standing down from conflict during a war.

""You see: homosexuality, dope, immorality in general -- these are the enemies of strong societies. That's why the Communists and the left-wingers are pushing the stuff; they're trying to destroy us.""

In 1973 Richard Nixon served a second term as president, he was voted in by a landslide, gaining over 60% of the votes.

Inflation became a problem, and to counter it Nixon had price controls set, controlling the market prices. The public didnt like this idea, according to Wikipedia meat disappeared from grocery stores and farmers DROWNED chickens rather than sell them at a loss.

Nixon chose to remove the gold standard, I dont quite understand economics like this so I'll quote from Wikipedia alot here. Basically, the US dollar was tied to gold bars, sitting in bank vaults or wherever they were kept. Deflation stepped in, the american dollar wasnt worth as much as it was before. OPEC, which is a group of countries that export oil, wasnt getting paid the same for oil, if we say they were getting paid $100 dollars for each barrel of oil, then that 100 dollars was only worth half as much as before, $50, now that the american dollar was lower. I made both those values up by the way, but basically the oil sellers were not getting paid what they wanted anymore. OPEC cut production, and raised prices for oil.

From Wikipedia

I love the quote from the Shah of Iran, about how they get screwed on the price of goods, so now they're treating the Western World the same way. It sounds fair to me, although it started the 1973 oil crisis.

The 1973 Oil Crisis affected america quite deeply, many petrol stations would be out of petrol all together, with signs saying exactly that, "out of gas". Fuel rationing was in place,
in the U.S., drivers of vehicles with license plates having an odd number as the last digit (or a vanity license plate) were allowed to purchase gasoline for their cars only on odd-numbered days of the month, while drivers of vehicles with even-numbered license plates were allowed to purchase fuel only on even-numbered days

The US Car makers, you know those guys who make really crappy cars? And are all pretty much bankrupt right now? Well, they started making smaller cars finally, and NASCAR reduced its car race distances by a whopping 10 percent.

"I can't shake hands with anybody from San Francisco."

Alternative fuels were seeked, in New Zealand it became semi popular to have cars that could also use LPG, natural gas, a conversion cost a thousand dollars or so, im not sure who much it cost at the time, I think its somewhere around the three thousand dollar mark now, dont hate me if Im wrong!

Inside the car, you have a knob to turn, you can run on both petrol or gas, you have the normal fuel tank, petrol, as well as a gas cylinder in the boot etc. I think its a pretty cool idea, to be so much more reliant, even if its kinda wacky. I know someone with a LPG capable car, it seems pretty interesting. I do think with LPG you dont have as good performance, you dont get as much engine power, but its still alot cheaper than petrol to use.

The Soviet Union exported oil , their economy had been bad for a while, but now they had much more demand for oil, so americans could really have been helping out their arch nemesis, the Soviet Union, by having to buy their oil.

Nixon mandated a new speed limit of 55 miles per hour, for the rest of the world thats about 90 kilometres per hour. This was to save fuel. Prior to the new speed limit, state set their own maximum speed limit, with some states being around 120 kilometres per hour, and apparently some rural roads you had no real speed limit, and could go as fast as you wanted.

I'll end with Watergate.

Watergate deserves its own episode, hopefully on Tank Riot.

The Watergate Complex is a apartment type hotel set of buildings in Washington DC. The buildings are in some funky retro looking shapes, including one (or two) thats a curled C shape, and another J shaped building.

On the 28th of May, 1972, a team of burglars working for Nixon's re election campaign broke in and installed wiretaps and took photos of the Democratic National Committee's offices inside the Watergate complex. The installed "bugs" were listened to from a hotel across the street. During a second break in, to replace a wiretap that had become faulty,five burglars were caught, and the Watergate scandal begun.

The Washington Post covered the story, and reporters used an FBI Informant who was known as "Deep Throat" to show how the men caught were working for Richard Nixon.
Deep Throat is a famous name, it was apparently from a porn movie of the same name, guess what happens in the movie.

Deep Throat is also used as a codename in Metal Gear Solid. Also, The Simpsons have had fun with the character, like Smithers meeting The Simpson family in a car park late at night to give them tips, this is based on the real Deep Throat.

Nixon at first tried to down play the convictions. It became known that Richard Nixon had a secret recording system setup, where things he said, conversations on his phones etc were recorded on tape. These Nixon tapes are on the internet, and are listened to still to find information about what happened.

Something interesting on one of the tapes, theres an 18 minute and 20 second gap. The first 5 minutes is apparently from Nixons secretary Rose Mary Woods, who accidentally hit record on her tape recorder controls while she reached for her telephone. Theres still controversy about this, Rose Mary Woods was asked to recreate how she accidentally hit record and wiped part of a tape, theres a photo on Wikipedia and its pretty odd how a leg is stretching out one way and her arms are another reaching for the phone. There are conspiracies that it was not an accidental wiping.

< i am not a crook clip >

I got these quotes from the Nixon Tapes from the article on Nixon, normally is thought of as just incredibly sick photos of rotting bodies and porn, but they have a great library resource too, believe me! They make fun of history true, but you'll learn interesting things that are not on Wikipedia because they sound biased. Theres a great photo of "win with dick bubble gum cigars, presidential favorites bubble gum cigars 5cents" I'll spare you my Nixon impression, I know its terrible.

During the watergate scandal, President Nixons approval rating fell to 23 percent support. Gerald Ford, Vice President, took over the presidency as Nixon resigned, facing impeachment, which is a being kicked out of the President job.

Nixon delivered the news of his resignation on television, and on the 9th of August 1974 he left office. He never admitted breaking the law, but regretted making some bad decisions.

The new president Gerald Ford pardoned Nixon of any crimes he MAY have committed. The president can basically overturn any conviction, getting people off death sentances etc.

Something very weird, on the evening of the pardon from newly elected President Ford, Nixon felt very sore, his left leg had swelled to three times its normal size. Phlebitis, flu-bite-is had returned, he had blood clots. This is mentioned in a Futurama episode that I'll play clips from very soon.

Ah what the hell, I'll try some more of my Nixon impression, just because you want to hear it so bad.

By the way, the word dike here means like a damn, not something else that would be funny coming from Nixon. Here he is talking with Henry Kissinger.

"Nixon: I still think we ought to take the North Vietnamese dikes out now. Will that drown people?
Kissinger: About two hundred thousand people.
Nixon: No, no, no, I'd rather use the nuclear bomb. Have you got that, Henry?
Kissinger: That, I think, would just be too much.
Nixon: The nuclear bomb, does that bother you?...I just want you to think big, Henry, for Christsakes."

doing that voice is killing the back of my throat! I cant do it too fast, or for long! Bear with me ok?

"Nixon: The only place where you and I disagree ... is with regard to the bombing. You're so goddamned concerned about civilians and I don't give a damn. I don't care.
Kissinger: I'm concerned about the civilians because I don't want the world to be mobilized against you as a butcher.

Theres a great episode of futurama called " A Head In The Polls", you really should google it, wikipedia has a great article about it. In Futurama, many famous dead people have been somehow kept alive as heads in glass jars filled with water, they get fed with what looks like goldfish food, flakes that get put into the jar. The heads themselves are bolted to the bottom of the jar, and the persons name is on a little plaque. Richard Nixons Head, as its often called, keeps turning up over the years, in A Head In The Polls he wants to be president again. "No-body" can be president more than twice, which Nixon was, but with a "new robot body" he runs for President against two idiot identical clones, one says one thing and the other says it slightly different. Throughout the episode many famous Nixon moments come up, I've got some clips to play now. Listen for Checkers the dog, which he doesnt want to give back, Checkers is also just a head in a jar, Nixons "good republican body", reffering to how Pat didnt have a fancy coat, but a good republican cloth coat, how Gerald Ford pardoned Nixon for any wrongdoings he may have done, and just some general made up evil nixon stuff! You'll also hear how a proper richard nixon impression sounds.

I've got a few more Richard Nixon Clips, this one is "you wont have nixon to kick around anymore", from when he didnt get elected as californian governor

In 1977 Richard Nixon worked on a PR comeback. He met with interviewer David Frost who paid Nixon six hundred thousand dollars for a few interviews. I dont know what that would be in todays money, but without a doubt thats a million or two?

In the interviews, Nixon does admit to some wrong doing,
"I did abuse the power I had as president." He said that at the time of his resignation, he was crippled and that "I said things that were not true." He revealed, "I brought myself down. I gave them a sword and they stuck it in. And they twisted it with relish. And, I guess, if I'd been in their position, I'd have done the same thing".

But still denied CRIMINAL wrong doing. Worldwide, over 45 million viewers saw the Frost interviews.

The Frost interviews were made into a play and recently a movie called Frost/Nixon.

In 1986, Nixon made a address to a newspaper convention, where he impressed people with his worldly knowledge. A headline was "hes back", which was also mentioned in the Futurama episode I played clips from, as "Nixons back!" while the robot Nixon stands on people, fires rockets, says "whos kicking who around now? and breaks into the white house "knock knock mwhahahahhaha". In Foreign affairs Nixon was respected as an elder statesman.

Richard Nixon opened his presidential library in California in 1990. It also has the house Richard Nixon was born in on the site.

Pat Nixon died in 1993 of health problems. Nixon was said to have cried deeply for the first time in his adult life. Ten months later, April 22 1994, Richard Nixon also died, they are both buried at the Richard Nixon Presidential Library.

Thank you very much for listening to this podcast episode, I do hope Tank Riot will make a Nixon episode of their own, so they can correct all the mistakes Im sure to have made.

If you want to contact me, even just to say you listened, send an email to, j a y w o n t d a r t @, I'd appreciate it.

Have a super happy day, bye.

<--End song You Can't Say No To A Soldier plays-->

Written for: Iceland (1942)
Lyric: Mack Gordon
Music: Harry Warren
Year: 1942
Original publisher: Twentieth Century Music Corporation, rights controlled by
Mayfair Music Corp

Listen, little lady, it's the order of the day,
Issued by the highest of authority;
Fellows in the service simply can't be turned away,
You know that defense must get priority.
So, if you're patriotic'lly inclined,
Heed the call to arms, and keep this thought in mind:

Chorus 1:

You can't say, "No," to a soldier,
A sailor or a handsome marine;
No, you can't say, "No," if he wants to dance,
If he's gonna fight, he's got a right to romance;
So, get out your lipstick and powder,
Be beautiful and dutiful, too.
If he's not your type, then it's still o-kay,
You can always kiss him in a sisterly way,

Oh, you can't say, "No,
No, you gotta give in,
If you want him to win for you.

Chorus 2 (from movie)

You can't say, "No," to a soldier,
A sailor or a handsome marine;
No, you can't say, "No," if he wants to dance,

If he's gonna fight, he's got a right to romance;
So, get out your lipstick and powder,
Be beautiful and dutiful, too.
If he says it's cold on those submarines,
You can knit a sweater, but that's not what he means;
Oh, you can't say, "No,"
No, no, no, no, no, no;
No, they're not made of tin,
So, you better give in

If you want him to win for you.

Richard Nixon

Quaker article,

Checkers Speech

1968 election,_1968 article

Friday, April 10, 2009

Episode 10 Podcasts

Episode 10, Podcasts

Hello and welcome to the tenth episode of Jay Wont dart's podcast.

This episode is about Podcasts themselves, a brief history of podcasting, some of my favourite podcasts, and how I make my podcasts. Perhaps you'll like some of the podcasts I mention, or even decide to make a podcast of your own.

Podcasting started as a way to have subscriptions to audio shows. It sort of evolved from RSS feeds, which stand for Really Simple Syndication. RSS feeds are like a website address that gets used by a program, such as an internet browser like Firefox, or a media program for podcasts such as Apple's iTunes. Using the podcast example, the RSS feed is subscribed to, checked for updates, and if they're available, iTunes will then download the latest episode.

Focussing on iTunes and podcasting again, Apple added a Podcast feature to iTunes in June 2005, with a podcast directory that had 3000 podcasts linked to. Within two days, one million podcast subscriptions were reported.

To give you a little idea about how useful podcasts can be, I'll include a short episode from ABC news, interviewing Apple CEO Steve Jobs when podcast features were released into iTunes.

One of the most famous podcasters is Adam Curry, who makes the "No Agenda" podcast that I love. Curry is known as "The Podfather", for being a celebrity who embraced the podcast medium early on. He didnt invent the idea of podcasts, but grabbed the idea while it was small, and held on.

Another famous podcaster is Leo Laporte, who broadcasts some thirty hours of audio a week, he has his own company TWiT, This Week in Tech, which has about 10 podcasts about Apple computers, Windows running PC's, security, bio tech and general computer news.

Most major news organizations also put out podcasts, I subscribe to the 60 Minutes podcast, its awesome, its actually only 40 something minutes long, you miss 20 whole minutes of ads from the tv version! Its also the full american version, in New Zealand we get a rehashed version for NZ, with a New Zealand host, and a couple of normally lame New Zealand stories each episode. The American show focuses on much larger issues normally like war, A list celebrity interviews, health breakthroughs etc. The stupid New Zealand issues are normally slapped in for some kiwi content, things about young mothers in Auckland, or P users in Christchurch. Not only do I miss out on 20 minutes of ads, but I also get to hear major stories a week or two before they are on the NZ show. I dont ever watch the televised NZ 60 minutes now, just listen to the podcast that comes out monday my time, probably released sometime sunday American time.

I also get Time podcasts, from Time magazine, documentaries from the BBC and audio from NPR, which is an american public radio station, we know them best from parodies on The Simpsons and Grand Theft Auto games where they have really boring content, and constantly beg for listener donations every 2 minutes.

Theres many types of online only content released as podcasts too, my Time magazine podcasts are only available as podcasts of course, you cant have audio in the magazine edition, so actual audio from interviews is released as podcasts, whereas in the magazine you just get edited text from the conversations.

Some of the best content only released as podcasts that I listen to include Stephen Fry's PODGRAMS, Stephen Fry is perhaps the smartest man in the world, Tank Riot, which is kind of my inspiration for my own podcasts, a bunch of friends talking about topics they like, and the many Vegan podcasts I like listening to, the most enjoyable is NZ Vegan Podcast. Until theres a Vegan Channel on TV, the internet and podcasting in particular is indispensable for Vegan shows.

Podcasts can be anything from some weird guy talking into a microphone in his bedroom, ahem, to professionally produced shows like the NZ Vegan Podcast. An interesting interview trick in podcasts is people using Skype to call people, and recording the audio from the call, there might as well be two people in a recording booth recording the show together, when they can be anywhere in the world thanks to Skype.

I'll quickly list the podcasts I subscribe to, all 36 of them :) I'll make it quick.

Adam Currys Daily Source Code, where Adam Curry talks about conspiracies,

Cranky Geeks, John C Dvoraks main show, I listen to the audio only version , its about 15MB per show compared to 100+ for the video , a computer news show,

The Debate Hour Podcast, debating for, you guessed it, an hour about gun control, abortion etc,

BBC Documentaries, stories about The Beetles and the Soviet union among others,

Great Speeches in History, where I've got a speeches from Nixon and Reagan, Martin Luther king and Nelson Mandela.

I Cringely, Cringely is a tech writer who also records his articles and puts podcast editions up, its very cool to choose between reading and listening, both for free, it takes me a minute or two to read the story, or about 10 minutes normally to listen to it read.

Borats Bits was a one off podcast, an australian interview with Borat, a character by Sacha Baron Cohen,

Next is my podcast,

The Kojima productions podcast, video game news,

The Laporte Report, The Tech Guy and Mac Break Weekly, all Leo Laportes technology podcasts,

Macintosh Folklore Radio, stories about the 1984 Macintosh development read out,

Marcus Lush, a Radio Live podcast that NEVER seems to get updated, its the highlights from his morning radio show,

Meat Free Media Podcast, a New Zealand Vegetarian/Vegan podcast,

Motown 50, Motown is celebrating a look back at their long history, this includes interviews with stars such as Stevie Wonder,

No Agenda, one of my favourite podcasts talking about random things mostly, life experiences, politics, real news, conspiracies and how Vegans are to blame for everything.

Bored yet? Almost over.

Intelligence Squared, and NPR Memorable moments 2007, thats from the american public radio station I mentioned , Intelligence Squared is some very good debates held in New York, and Memorable Moments is highlights from 2007 that were on the radio.

NZ Vegan podcast, my personal favourite podcast, and thats saying something, I listen to podcasts for over an hour a day, and NZ Vegan is by far my favourite.

The Onion Radio News, one minute fake news clips, very funny.

Peta's Podcast, talking about animal rights ,

The Secret Diary of Steve Ballmer, a joke podcast with articles from the fake ballmer blog read by Alex, the mac voice I also use. Hasnt been updated for awhile now.

A Meet the Author Episode, Meet The Author is an Apple podcast featuring book writers talking about their books for an hour or so, I have the Stephen Fry episode, he talks about his history with Apple computers.

Steve Jobs and Bill Gates at D5, a tech conference with Bill Gates from Microsoft and Steve Jobs of Apple talking with Walt Mossberg, a famous tech journalist.

Tank Riot, talking about mostly nerdy topics like sci fi movies and scientists, a very good podcast.

Tech 5 comes out during week days, its an american podcast by John C Dvorak who also is on Cranky Geeks and No Agenda,

This WEEK in TECH, Leo Laportes main podast that comes out weekly of course,

Thrillercast, people talking about how great black Michael Jackson was, to do with the release of Thriller 25, the greatest selling album of all time,

Three Time magazine podcasts, Entertainment, Politics and 10 Questions, where you hear full interviews.

Vegan Freak Radio, a podcast for Vegans,

and finally the 60 minutes show.

Right now I have 9GB of podcasts, 11.1 days worth according to iTunes. I have 36 different podcasts.

To end, I'll tell you, dear listener, how I make my podcast.

Basically, I type out a script, I figure out what I want to talk about in advance, what sound clips I want to use, and get it all prepared. Then I use Garageband, a audio recording program that comes with all Apple computers, part of iLife, I basically open up TextEdit, which is the Word like program with my script in it, I click record in Garageband and Command Plus Tab to switch quickly to the script in front of all the other programs. If I need to pause and correct a mistake or something I can switch back and re-record that flubbed line. To put sound files in , I just drag AAC sound files into Garageband in the place I want them.

Finally, when Im all recorded in Garageband, I export the recording to iTunes, which takes a couple of minutes getting it all mixed right, and convert it from a 900MB odd AIFF type sound file to a 10-40MB AAC sound file, for the final podcast.

I put in the information like author, the name of the podcast episode, and I copy the script I read from into the Lyrics section, or description, so it shows up when you play the sound file back on an iPod or in iTunes itself.

I also add the Album art, a photo I took of a Dragonfly outside of the kitchen here.

When I have the AAC sound file on my Desktop, I upload to, which saves websites like a museum, they seem to have infinite storage space, they let you upload files for free to their servers.

Then, I copy the actual link to the sound file on the server, very important, and paste that as a media link into my Blog. At the Blog,, I also paste the show script in the blog entry. So you could always just read my full podcast episode there without downloading the audio :)

When I update my blogspot blog, my Feedburner RSS feed account picks up the new entry and adds it to my RSS Feed automatically. I also log into Feedburner to update the RSS feed's description for iTunes to pick up, I include the topics of the episode into the description so they also work as keywords on iTunes, if someone searchs for keywords I've used in my podcast topics, it should show in iTunes, if you search for South Invercargill, or Mister Rogers, I should show up.

iTunes just shows the RSS feed, it doesnt do any storage or sending of the podcast itself. The crucial thing in podcasting is the RSS feed, you dont need iTunes to listen to podcasts, its the best thing for podcast management of course, but you dont need it. All you need is the RSS feed address.

So, to sum up, I record my podcast, upload it to who host for free, I make a blog post with the link to the actual file, my feedburner RSS feed picks up that new blog entry automatically and when iTunes updates RSS feeds, it will notice my new episode and download it automatically to your computer! Simple!

Well, thank you again for listening to this long and boring podcast episode. My next episode topics include some more No Agenda stuff, Im making two seperate episodes, one for Crackpot and one for The Buzzkill, clips from No Agenda to do with each of the main hosts, Crackpot, Adam Curry, with his wacky conspiracies, including the Hydroxy Booster he got a bunch of hippies to cook up and add to his Jaguar, to try and get more out of the fuel he uses.

The Buzzkill, John C Dvorak, the calmer older host, with lots of interesting lifestories. Some of the things he talks about include Hummingbirds, Soy Milk, Honey and the little Black Kids who go door to door in his area trying to get you to buy magazines.

If you want to contact me, even just to say you listened, send an email to, j a y w o n t d a r t @, I'd appreciate it.

Have a super happy day, bye.

<--End song You Can't Say No To A Soldier plays-->

Written for: Iceland (1942)
Lyric: Mack Gordon
Music: Harry Warren
Year: 1942
Original publisher: Twentieth Century Music Corporation, rights controlled by
Mayfair Music Corp

Listen, little lady, it's the order of the day,
Issued by the highest of authority;
Fellows in the service simply can't be turned away,
You know that defense must get priority.
So, if you're patriotic'lly inclined,
Heed the call to arms, and keep this thought in mind:

Chorus 1:

You can't say, "No," to a soldier,
A sailor or a handsome marine;
No, you can't say, "No," if he wants to dance,
If he's gonna fight, he's got a right to romance;
So, get out your lipstick and powder,
Be beautiful and dutiful, too.
If he's not your type, then it's still o-kay,
You can always kiss him in a sisterly way,

Oh, you can't say, "No,
No, you gotta give in,
If you want him to win for you.

Chorus 2 (from movie)

You can't say, "No," to a soldier,
A sailor or a handsome marine;
No, you can't say, "No," if he wants to dance,

If he's gonna fight, he's got a right to romance;
So, get out your lipstick and powder,
Be beautiful and dutiful, too.
If he says it's cold on those submarines,
You can knit a sweater, but that's not what he means;
Oh, you can't say, "No,"
No, no, no, no, no, no;
No, they're not made of tin,
So, you better give in

If you want him to win for you.



ABC News Podcasting added to iTunes, interview with Steve Jobs from the iTunes store